It’s ‘Appraisal’ time! The annual (so I’m told) admin event, wherein we get sent a form to fill in and forward to our ‘Line Manager’ as discussion subject matter for a subsequent ‘interview’ to be arranged.
I’ve hitherto somehow managed to avoid this box-ticking dreck – by simply, er, ignoring it. I have no idea how this panned out in previous years; presumably the boxes got ticked or I’d have been chased up about it. (Wouldn’t I?) This year, however, the reminders are greater in number, suggesting I’m going to have to conform. So, what of the Personal Performance and Development Review Form? Well, it commences thus:
‘This form is designed to facilitate a discussion which should concentrate on your achievements, expectations and outcomes, and how these relate to your performance, development and career aspirations. It will also focus on how your plans fit in with School or Professional Services’ strategic plan and the University’s Corporate Strategy. The Personal Performance and Development Review is designed to help you to realise your potential and recognise your contribution to the University. The process is intended to be mutually beneficial to both you and the University. Above all, the review gives you a chance to discuss issues that are important to you in a fair and open fashion.’
Eeesh! Take a chill pill, will yer!
Part 1: Achievements, in which I’m expected to discuss whether I’ve achieved the objectives agreed at my last appraisal. Well, that shouldn’t take long.
Part 2: Expectations, towards agreeing objectives for the coming period. Simple – get published. (Although I won’t discuss that I vowed to myself at the turn of the year that, if I don’t get published by the end of this one, I’m out. Might rue that one, matey; time speeds by, research grinds slowly on.)
Yeah, I’m being flippant, I know. It’s just that I’m not interested in this kind of thing. I’ve no time for the projects dreamed up by those who attend meetings to discuss ‘strategic plans’ and ‘Corporate Strategies’ and other such management-style terminological guff. Sorry! And I don’t have ‘career aspirations’; why should I?
It’s at times like these that I’m inclined to quote the last line of The Commitments.