Sent: Fri 06/06/2008 19:26
Subject: Fire Regulations: Duthie Doors (63/FR/3/2005)
Hi All,
Having made the decision to stay in Southampton, I’ve been stitched up, sorry, ‘rewarded’ with an additional role: I’m to be the new ‘Assistant Fire Prevention Officer’ for Duthie Building, with immediate effect (could be the pinnacle of my career).
My first task is inform you of the following: along with the necessity of the lift being replaced, it turns out that the wooden internal office doors do not meet updated fire regulation specs, and so require ‘re-treating’ to render them properly safe. (You may have seen clip-boarded people wandering round the past week or so, looking at doors and things for no apparent reason.)
Apparently, the chemical stuff they are to be treated with is ‘hazardous when wet’; therefore, the doors cannot be treated in situ. Instead they are to be removed, treated and returned later. Obviously, all the doors cannot be removed in one fell swoop, as this would be totally anti-fire regulations. So, it is planned such that doors will be removed in phases. You may get pre-notification that your office door is to be removed; or you might just turn up one day to find it gone – but you will now know why.
Hope this is sufficiently explanatory.
Regards,
Lee.
Lee Turnpenny 
Ah, Henry said you’d found a creative solution to his problem.
Yes, Lee, if you could just sneak one or two out, under your labcoat, like, ask no questions, know what I mean, nudge nudge.
Actually, guys, light might be shed on what has driven this, indirectly via Henry. If I direct you to comments arising tangentially from a previous post (wink, wink).